"Inhibitions"- Feedback!

DJS

AKA. Emery Layton

Posts: 74
Accolades: Union Battleground Championship (x1), Trench War Championship (x1), King Cobra Championship (x1)

"Inhibitions"- Feedback! Jan 16, 2017 16:35:05 GMT -5

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Post by DJS on Jan 16, 2017 16:35:05 GMT -5

I'm a big fan and advocate of getting feedback, because it's what helps improve writing and makes characters better, more fleshed out and rounded.

I see a few people have posted feedback/reaction/whatever threads here, so I'm gonna join in on this. Anyone got any notes? Observations? Gripes? Heck, does anyone wanna just say what they thought of it?

Go for it! I'm a grown up, I can take it.

Wayne Richards Administrator Twitter Intern Posts: 815 Staff Member	"Inhibitions"- Feedback! Jan 16, 2017 19:59:58 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Wayne Richards on Jan 16, 2017 19:59:58 GMT -5 I liked it, thought it was intriguing and brought out the mess that Emery is. Great debut RP!

Deleted Deleted Member Posts: 0	"Inhibitions"- Feedback! Jan 17, 2017 5:29:44 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Deleted on Jan 17, 2017 5:29:44 GMT -5 I really liked it. Good work!

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"Inhibitions"- Feedback! Jan 17, 2017 10:04:55 GMT -5

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Post by Deleted on Jan 17, 2017 10:04:55 GMT -5

I laughed at the puking scene and how you wrote, I think I swallowed it. Plus a little bit of history without it taking over your rp. If UB wasn't a micro fed or have a word limit, I would say expand on your history, but given the 1,500 word limit, it was perfecto.

Wayne Richards
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"Inhibitions"- Feedback! Jan 17, 2017 12:16:05 GMT -5

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Post by Wayne Richards on Jan 17, 2017 12:16:05 GMT -5

Jan 17, 2017 10:04:55 GMT -5 @tweeder said:

I laughed at the puking scene and how you wrote, I think I swallowed it. Plus a little bit of history without it taking over your rp. If UB wasn't a micro fed or have a word limit, I would say expand on your history, but given the 1,500 word limit, it was perfecto.

I think the 1500 word limit is good for that, because for a match RP, your title histories and things like that are a bit boring. But we have our character development board, where you can go nuts on writing however many RPs and however long you want on your history, or whatever else.

Like DJS's piece here, it had a mix of humor, back story/character arc, match/opponent details, and it wasn't drawn out. Great example of what I'm looking for. 👍

Post by DJS on Jan 16, 2017 16:35:05 GMT -5

Post by Wayne Richards on Jan 16, 2017 19:59:58 GMT -5

Post by Deleted on Jan 17, 2017 5:29:44 GMT -5

Post by Deleted on Jan 17, 2017 10:04:55 GMT -5

Post by Wayne Richards on Jan 17, 2017 12:16:05 GMT -5

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