Post by Kira Izumi on Jul 13, 2018 21:22:01 GMT -5
*OOC Note: Sorry this is so late and close to the deadline. I apologize to Axel and Caden. Been writting up a storm for my fed as well and stuff. Anyways here's to the RP it's self.*
We open up to see a beige brick building. Blue letters are on the front. "WALMART" they read. But "WALMART" is not a place any mere mortal should ever go. This hellish landscape of nuts and drunkards is so bleak, so evil... This is the story of how Kira and his beloved family stumbled upon this vile establishment. Along with a promo material for his upcoming match up!
Kira is seen pushing a stroller with his 10 month old daughter, Ai inside. Kirito, his wife and manager is walking beside him. They're in America today, as one would be when they have a match coming up in a few days. But this isn't a day like any other. This day Kira made a mistake. A grave mistake. He thought nothing of it at first, just like we all do when we're in need of some quick items. I mean this is the place that's said to have it all! Said to have 12 cash registers open! What a wonderful place it would be, only if they knew the horrid truth of this godforsaken wasteland.
"(So what all do we need again baby?)"
"(Some more diapers, baby wipes, formula and what ever else we might just want while we're in here.)"
"(Alright. This shouldn't take too long if what i've seen from commercials this place should have a bunch of registers open and stuff. Just gotta figure out where everything is now.)"
The family walk past the blue pillars and through the sliding doors. their met with a barren area full of shoppers coming in and out with one side of them having a few crooked and rigged claw machines while the other side has a cascade of buggies arranged in a mess.
"(Hey how 'bout you take Ai fer a bit while i take the buggy and go on an' git what we need. That sound good hun?)"
"(Yeah, sweetie.)"
Kirito says as she takes control of the stroller and walks in with the baby, a smile on her face she goes on in. Meanwhile Kira manages to finally find a buggy that's not got a squeaky wheel or a messed up one. After about 10 minutes of searching he finally manages to get into the store proper.
"(Ya know i'm facing a real tough son of a bitch this week. This Caden Walker feller. I've seen what he can do. He can fuck ya up if yer not careful, ya know? He can really fuck ya up if yer a cocky son of a bitch. But... Lets see where the hell're the diapers an' shit at...)"
Kira starts walking around the store aimlessly before he manages to find himself in the food aisle. He starts looking at the prices and the products on the shelf. From the bags of chips on one side of him to the bags and boxes of candy on his other side.
"(Now where the hells the baby shit at? Maybe this guy knows...)"
Kira pushes the buggy and approaches another shopper holding a 12 pack in his hands.
"Hey you!"
"Yeah? What the hell ye want?"
"No need ta git an attitude here buddy. Ye know where the hell the baby shit in this place is?"
"Naw. What i look like ta ya? I ain't got a damn clue where that shit is. Now leave me alone, i gotta go drink my problems away like every body else in this shit hole of a city and state."
"Listen here, i agree witcha that this place absolutely sucks dick cheese, but i need some shit fer my little girl. She's done ran outta diapers an shit while we're stayin in this shit hole. So do ya know where the shit is or not pal?"
"Don'tcha understand english? i just toldja i ain't got no damn clue. Maybe on yonder there or somethin'. Shit just leave me alone already with my beer an' my food. Yer startin' ta piss me off ya damn idjit. Go on back ta where ya were bafore an leave me outta it. You an yer 'daughter' can go an' fuck yer selfs fer all i care."
Kira starts getting agitated and pissed off by the drunk ass whole. He walks past him and "accidentally" shoves the 12 pack of beer out of his hands, making it splatter all over the ground and on the drunk.
"Sorry, i tripped over my own feet. Thanks fer the directions cockslap."
And so after that awful meeting Kira continues his journey to do a promo while shopping for baby products in this store called walmart.
"(Can ya believe some ass wholes? What a cockslap. Anyway back ta where i was with this Walker feller. The dude may be big, he may be tall and all o' this. But Kira Izumi's fought and beaten bigger, taller and stronger. I got what it takes ta beat him. Besides he couldn't even beat me at Guerrilla Warfare right?)"
Kira eventually finds the aisle he wants. He goes to where the diapers are. He looks up and down for the right size for his little girl. But then starts looking at the prices. Hey he may make a decent amount working in god knows how many promotions, but that doesn't mean he can't be cheap.
"(Ya know... Caden is kinda like these diapers right here.)" Kira says as he points to a brand of diapers i'm not sure we can name without being sued.
"(Yeah, he reminds me allot of 'em. They're both not worth my damn time. I mean for fucks sake 10 bucks fer only 10 diapers? You got me all kinds o' messed up with that.)"
Kira eventually finds some that's a good price and quantity. He puts them in the buggy and looks for some baby wipes now. He eventually finds them and the other stuff he needed to get in this section. After that he pulls out his phone to call Kirito.
"(Yeah, it's me. I got the baby stuff. Where're y'all at now?)"
...
"(Alright be there in a minute or two.)"
Kira hangs up his phone now and meets up with Kirito. They eventually get all they need and go down to where the registers are. Kira goes back and forth a few times to make sure he's seeing what he's seeing is right. Only one register is open. Only ONE register is open and the line is long and i mean LOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG. Kira sighs, disappointed and frustrated. Him and Kirito manage to get in line somehow. After what feels like forever they eventually see the area where you put your items on.
"(We're never going to this place again. I don't care if this is the last store in America i'll never step foot in this fucker again.)"
"(LANGUAGE! I know yer mad honey, but ya can't be using that language in front of Ai.)"
"(Sorry sweetie. It's just this dam- dang line is long as hell, We've been waiting for this thing for an hour and a fuc- freakin' half now. Mad isn't even the beginning of it. Right now i wanna git outta this place.)"
They eventually get their stuff on the thing now. The cashier takes even longer now, talking to the person in front of them. Kira is getting even more pissed off now.
"Hey! Can't ya go on an' talk on yer break or somethin? Tell the lady yer damn life story on yer time! Not ours! Now for fucks sake git yer shit so we can git outta this hell hole! You God da-"
Kirito stops him from saying anymore and gives him a look as if hinting for him to not say anything else till they get out of the store. They eventually get their stuff rung up and out the door.
"You know what? i'm happy we're out of that shit whole! An' ya know what else? Caden Walker is allot like Wallmart. Both covered in beige on the outside, and more importantly both fucking SUCK! FUCK WALMART! AND FUCK WALKER! YER BOTH FUCKING DEAD!"
Kira and his family leave for their car as the screen fades.
