Post by Wayne Richards on Feb 5, 2017 9:16:43 GMT -5
It was a good start for your first one ever. It did seem a little repetitive at times, there were some typos, and some of the phrasing seemed hard to read and understand. I'd like to see you do some more character developing, as of now I just know that this is your first place, and you're coming for the belt. I want to know why, and what makes your character tick, things like that. With us having just a 1 RP limit and roughly two weeks to post it, I suggest really taking your time with it, map it out, read it over and do some proofreading. But I've seen worse, so like I said it's a good start!
Yeah, like Graves said, really take your time with it. Since you have two weeks, you’re in no hurry. Now I know that you probably don't know me and so my opinion probably don't mean much but — this was a good start, especially for your first one ever.
Here’s a couple of tips that I would use if I was active here competitively:
•• Focus on the match and opponent at hand. •• Try to use a unique setting. •• This one is much harder to do but try to tell a story through the dialogue of your promos.
These tips can really help to create a strong promo/roleplay and I think you’ll get there very soon. Honestly? Cutting promos be it real talking or typing is an art form and really hard to do and even harder to master. However, just figure out the message that you’re wanting to convey and then strike it.
Last but certainly not least and this is just my humble opinion but — always try to make your opponent look good too. Remember, if you make your opponent look like crap and you beat them then well, that win means nothing. If you lose to that crappy person then it's even worse because wasn't that person terrible, a curtain jerker to you? If they're so bad then what does that make you since you lost to them?
Now like I said, that last one is my logic and theory. Most in fedding today don't use that logic and I am simply an old-school mind and soul so bleh… Ignore me if you want.
Anyway, hope my feedback helps and if not then I understand as well.
